Every day I forget about my purpose in life and I begin to second guess all the risks I'm taking. It's not easy to admit, but taking chances this year has been an uphill battle. I second guess every decision and ultimately it hurts my drive and creativity. I don't expect anyone to understand how I feel. But, I know that some of you will understand because you might be or know someone that is going through the same struggle. I try to write my thoughts down but Im clouded by the fear that consumes my process. There's no easier way to describe it, but there's a level of discomfort when you're constantly releasing work and it seems that nobody is paying attention. It feels as if everything I'm doing is being recycled by the lack of motivation I carry. It's not hard to take chances, but its harder when your blind folded to the truth. I can sit here and say, "Im not going to care anymore" but that isn't true. I have to care about what I create because if not, my work will continue to suffer.
